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Don’t Communicate With Someone From Across A Large Room

October 21, 2008

It’s Just Not Worth It.

It’s Friday afternoon and you’re sitting in the lecture hall silently urging time to go by.

You happen to look up from the pair of boobs you are drawing, and notice the hot chick from your class trying to catch your attention from 30 feet away. You’ve never really spoken, but you always harboured a suspicion that she wanted to touch your penis, and now feel rather vindicated by her actions.

She is trying to tell you about a party later in the evening, and your heart races as you begin running through the various underpants you could wear that night. You eventually settle on the burgundy-coloured briefs (your favourite, and the ones which make your balls look huge) as you continue to converse with her.

You’re not sure what she is saying, but she is laughing at the faces you’re pulling, so you’re laughing right back, and the banter carries on for the next ten minutes.

It is only whilst trying to find out what time she wants to be picked up, that you happen to turn around, and realise that she has in fact, been communicating with the pretty boy rugby jock the whole time. The. Whole. Time.

Which is why you should never communicate with someone from across a large room.

95% of the time, you end up looking like a massive chop.


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7 Comments so far

  1. Wezz October 21, 2008 12:20 pm

    Yeah story of my life.

  2. Shaun October 21, 2008 12:38 pm

    @Wezz,

    You and me both. It happens far too often for my liking.

    Far too often.

  3. Nash October 21, 2008 5:18 pm

    I make stupid half whispers through my CLOSED car window when I’m telling the 100th dude I don’t want to buy anything. I always feel like a chop after, more so when there are a few people in the car.
    Right there, whilst I whimper…through the closed window…loser

    I need a drink.

  4. Shaun October 21, 2008 6:03 pm

    @Nash,

    Yeah, and your voice will ALWAYS go higher when there are a few people in the car with you.

    Fact.

  5. SheBee October 21, 2008 10:30 pm

    Well I for one am one of those girls who go for the guys who feel like chops, so fear not boys – there are *some* of us out there :P

  6. SheBee October 21, 2008 10:31 pm

    “Awaiting Moderation”?!

    What kind, chaaaina? <– do I sound like a surfer? I tried really hard. So do I? Huh?

  7. SheBee October 21, 2008 10:32 pm

    You need a follow upper commenter thingie.

    I’m just saying…

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  1. Six Classic Gems From Shaun Oakes November 18, 2009 11:54 pm

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