Mindless Athletic Fun

I’ve spent the last 19 hours playing this non-stop, and now you should play this too. Go here and see if you can get this shitty athlete to complete 100 metres. (I managed 34 metres earlier on, who can beat that?)

I like this game because the guy reminds me of myself during High School sports days. I couldn’t run very well, but I was still awesome. Sorry that’s Awesome, with a capital AAAAAAAYYYYEEE!

…Is That Chicks Won’t Dig You

“Ha ha ha, Movember is going to be so cool. I’m going to grow a lovely moustache and bask in my manliness,” you think to yourself on November 1st.

Then a couple of weeks go by and suddenly it dawns on you that growing a moustache is not that cool, that in fact, you look like a bit of a chop, and that inexplicably, your girlfriend refuses to sleep with you, as your rough “tash” gives her a rash on her thighs.

So I ask you, is this all really worth it? Everyone I spoke to seems to be complaining about not getting any action since they grew a Tom Selleck. Are chicks not digging the hairy vibe anymore? Christ, even Some Other Guy is complaining, and he was the one who got me involved in the first place.

So what does everyone else think? Should we just scrap this, or should we mission on until the end?

Just To Clear The Air.

You all know who Miley Cyrus is, right? Yes, that’s right, she’s the singer daughter of Billy Ray Cyrus, the guy that sang the lovable treffer, “Achy Breaky Heart” back in the 90’s. (God, how we jammed to that song).

Anyhoo, apparently someone hacked into her YouTube channel the other day, and posted a video claiming that she had been knocked over by a drunk driver and subsequently died. Naughty.

Miley Cyrus’ best friend has been forced to deny claims the Hannah Montana star is dead. Mandy Jiroux - who creates videos with Miley as part of the Miley And Mandy Show on video sharing website YouTube - insists the 15-year-old star is fit ad healthy, despite footage claiming she had been hit by a drunk driver appearing on the Internet. The video, posted on the Miley And Mandy Show YouTube page, was alleged to be from Mandy and said: “Hey guys, this is Mandy and I have some very sad news. We’re very hurt to tell everyone this, but Miley died this morning after being hit by a drunk driver. Miley told us if anything ever happened to her then we should let her fans know before the public. RIP honey, we will miss you so much.” A furious Mandy has now posted a written response on her personal MySpace page declaring Miley alive and well. She writes: “Someone hacked the Miley And Mandy Show YouTube account and we can’t get back into it just yet! Miley is OK!” [via]

This incident reminds me of the time someone started spreading rumours that Britney Spears and I were an item. I laughed it off at first, but it started getting out of hand, and eventually Britney had to release a statement denying ever having slept with me. Do you guys remember that? It was round about 2004, back when I was still in that whole male backup dancer vibe and touring Los Angeles. Yeah, good times, I must still put those pics up on Facebook, I keep forgetting.

Anyways, on another matter, how old is Miley Cyrus now? Are we allowed to say that she’s hot yet? Because she is turning into a bit of a belter, isn’t she?

What was that? She’s 15?

Oh, okay. So… does that mean I can’t say that? Or I can?

No?

Yes?

No?

I can’t?

Yes, of course I know that… I was just saying.