Things You Didn’t Know.
The O' Bomber - Owning Them On The Basketball Court.
I am a giver, like a genie who has just been freed from his lamp, and now wants to satisfy you in a non-sexual way. Today we will look at some interesting facts about Barack Obama, facts you can now casually throw out with great authority, next time there is a lull in conversation at the braai, around the dinner table, or on the hard wood lounge floor when you’re being “spontaneous” with your lover.
Here with some facts then, which have been sourced from around the “internet”:
- He collects Spider-Man and Conan the Barbarian comics.
- He was known as “O’Bomber” at high school for his skill at basketball, and even today will own you on the court.
- He won a Grammy in 2006 for the audio version of his memoir, Dreams From My Father, which sold 100 million copies worldwide.
- He is left-handed – the sixth post-war US president to be left-handed. He is also black. The first US president to not be white. And crusty.
- He has read every Harry Potter book, including ones that haven’t even been written yet, and thinks Voldemort is “a bit of a prick”.
- He can speak Spanish, Afrikaans and a little bit of Xhosa.
- He smokes cigars and cigarettes, but only when he plays poker.
- He really enjoys playing poker.
- He can bench press an impressive 2000lbs.
- He has been to the moon. Twice.
- His favourite movies include Casablanca, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest and Pooty Tang.
- He lists his favourite musicians as Miles Davis, Bob Dylan, and Dr Dre.
- He was given the code name “Renegade” by his Secret Service handlers.
- He plans to install a basketball court in the White House grounds.
- For many years, he was referred to as “Barry”, until university, when he asked to be addressed by his full name.
- His hobbies and interests include “kicking ass” and “taking names”.
- His second name is “Awesome”.
- He would have liked to have been an architect if he were not a politician.
- He is an avid Springbok rugby supporter, and has a poster of Percy Montgomery on his bedroom wall.
- On his desk he has a carving of a wooden hand holding an egg, which is a Kenyan symbol of the fragility of life.
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Mmm, I’m not going to lie, some of these facts sound just a little far-fetched to me. I mean, he wanted to be an architect? REALLY now?
Anyhoo, don’t fret about it, said with the right conviction most people will believe anything you say.
It’s like that one night a few years back when I was trying to impress this chick at Contis in Claremont and I told her I was a doctor, then this old-looking guy collapsed on the dance-floor and she somehow expected me to resuscitate him.
Needless to say I failed, and he unfortunately suffered permanent brain damage, but today Barry Hilton is regarded as one of South Africa’s top comedians, so I think everything worked out for the best.
Boom! Boom! Call the ambulance, I am on fire today.
This was written by the hulking mass of manliness known as Shaun Oakes. If you enjoyed what he had to say, you owe it to yourself to follow him on Twitter at @shaunoakes.
Do it now.
Did you know that he also supports Braai4Heritage on 24 September each year. He just loves a BBQ and since Tutu joined our cause most worldleaders supports our national day of festivities.