Worth a Watch

Remember the other day I was talking about the iPhone vs a Blackberry and which one was the better smartphone?

No of course you wouldn’t, no one bothered replying, except for a few people on my Facebook Page.

Anyhoo, if you are familiar with Apple and iPhone fans, you will more than likely enjoy this little cartoon:

Hey? Did you enjoy that?

I don’t care.

I was just quoting what she was saying. I wasn’t saying that myself.

I do care.

So much.

Come closer, I want to show you something.

It’s in my pocket.

Oakes signing off.

Assuming They Had Legs To Kick The Shit Out Of Each Other.

iPhone vs Blackberry - Who would kick ass?

I think it might be time for me to upgrade my cell phone. I realised this when the guy selling South African flags at the traffic lights the other day, laughed at me when I took a pic of him with my cellphone, and said I would transfer it to my computer at home, and then upload it to my TwitPic account later that day.

“Why don’t you just do a sketch of me, it will probably be quicker,” he said sarcastically in pidgin English, which annoyed me, as a sketch portrait was in fact my first choice, but I thought it would be presumptious of me to suggest it. Suffice to say, I didn’t take his picture, or buy one of his overpriced flags, but his comments left me burned for several days after, as I sulked in my study.

The Girlfriend has now suggested that we both get iPhones, whilst I am more open to the Blackberry. To tell you the truth, my knowledge of smart phones is pretty much on par with my knowledge of the female body. I know just about enough to get by, but it’s pretty much a huge grey zone consisting of trial and error, things I see in magazines, and a couple of high res videos I have downloaded off the net.

So if anyone is reading this and has a bit of knowledge they would like to share on the subject (smart phones, not the female body – we will leave that for another time) give me a tinkle.

I want to be able to take decent quality photos and videos, easily upload them to Facebook or YouTube, chat online via Twitter, and access my blog quickly and easily. Oh and be able to send and receive emails in an efficient manner.

What’s my best bet?

An iPhone?

Or a Blackberry?

Oakes signing off.

I Just Managed To Upgrade My WordPress Blog

A Geek - Similar to Shaun.

So I haven’t written anything in April up till now. That was my April Fool’s Joke.

Did you get it?

No?

Yeah, neither did anyone else.

So when I eventually decided to get around to writing something, I thought I would also use the opportunity to give my blog a bit of a servicing, pretty much all the background stuff – check that the engine was running nicely, oil was changed etc.

Unfortunately, I did all this whilst polishing off a bottle of wine I found in my fridge a few days back, and thus ended up mucking things up on a royal scale. If you had the misfortune of visiting this site recently, you would have seen all sorts of techie jargon about “Infinite Loops” and “Database Errors” etc etc.

As you can see though, I have somehow managed to fix this all up by myself, which if you know me personally, will realise that it’s a pretty monumental achievement on my part. (I just recently worked out how to make a conference call the other day.)

So anyway, there might still be the odd little bug here and there, but otherwise we should be good to go again.

Excited?

I am.

You can’t see me but I am sitting here with a semi right now.

Just for you.

Okay, let’s chat again tomorrow.

Oakes signing off.

And Let His Awesomeness Radiate Over You, Like Warm Seamen.

Boom! Did he really write that? Nah, he didn’t, he was clearly talking about sailors.

I’m sure I’ve mentioned Twitter before, haven’t I? I can’t find the post, but I know I have, I’m not lying about it.

Anyhoo, you should be pretty familiar with Twitter by now, it’s like the new Facebook, and EVERYONE is using it. Even your mom.

It allows you to send short messages (140 characters) and is great for sending short updates on what you’re doing, interesting links or things you’ve seen, and just general musings. Some cool people are making use of Twitter, including the likes of Britney Spears, Chuck Norris, John Cleese and even Julius Malema.

Even more importantly however, is the fact that I am on Twitter, and you can now follow my “tweets”, as they happen in real time.

Here with some of my recent musings:

• I think I’m going to make the Running Man a fashionable dance move again. It’s time has come.
• I seem to be peeling. I’m going to collect all the bits and use it to create a clone.
• I am going to start dressing up as a Pirate. I will need a parrot though. Preferably a green one.
• Woke up this morning to find The Girlfriend’s foot in my mouth. Today could be a weird day.
• My nose is itching. someone is obviously having dirty thoughts about me.
• There is something rather liberating about not wearing underpants on tuesdays. it’s a bit manky to do this on wednesdays though.
• The Monster Energy drink (lo-carb) is so sexy. I want to sleep with it and get it pregnant.
• Last night was spent dancing on the ceiling. I can confirm that it is, in fact, quite a feeling.

For more of these daily gems, do yourself a favour and follow me on Twitter.



Follow Shaun Oakes on Twitter. You will thank yourself in the morning.

Go. I’m finished speaking to you now.

Read This When You Have Time.

So as many of you are aware, when I’m not putting together multi million dollar deals, feeling up The Girlfriend, or inventing things like the colour red, I sporadically hang out at this internet marketing agency in town. (Cape Town, not Chi Town. Or O-Town.)

Sometimes, I occasionally write things for them as well.

This is one of those occasions.

Take a look and read it, it’s well worth two minutes of your time. Here with an incredibly teasing extract:

Do it, you know you want to.

Does Anyone Care About MySpace Though?

So I was thinking about setting up a MySpace page the other day for my rock band, which I’m still busy putting together but will no doubt be incredibly awesome. Anyhoo, I was reading up on MySpace and what they are all about, and noticed that they are now also allowing you to manage and set up your own adverts, which would then appear on other people’s pages, according to their profiles. Similar to Google Adwords in a way.

MyAds By MySpace

I dunno. I get that more and more of these free social networking sites need to start making money, but the whole advert vibe only seems to work for Google. I know Facebook have also been running adverts for a while now, but has anyone ever clicked on one?

I think I did maybe once – there was a picture of a women with a very impressive cleavage, and I thought it might lead me to naked pics of Patricia Lewis, but sadly it didn’t.

Anyhoo, if you’re interested, you can head over here, to learn more about it.

So don’t say you never learn anything over here, because you just have.

We Take A Closer Look At It.

YouTube - Taking A Closer Look.

So, I was f**king around on YouTube this evening, looking for a new Friday Feel Good Jam, when I noticed a couple of things.

Firstly, I wasn’t wearing any pants, which surprised me as I had just gone to Gardens Centre a few minutes earlier and never really picked up on this.

The other thing I realised though, is that YouTube seems to be quietly adding interesting little features to their website, like a young man slyly shaving his pubic hairs to make his balls look bigger to his seasoned lover. In this instance, YouTube have given their balls an enlarged appearance through the following:

Click To Buy / Download
You can now view certain music videos, trailers for games, and other shit of that nature, and then click to purchase it through iTunes or Amazon (there is a screenshot below so that you can see that I’m not lying.)

Screenshot: Because Shaun Doesn't Talk Shit.

Slim. Not slim as in “thin” though, I mean slim as in “clever”, it’s an Afrikaans word.

Audio Preview Of Comments
The other cool thing I noticed is that when you make a comment now, you can have it read back to you before submitting. This is great because you can then hear what it sounds like first which thus prevents you from writing something ignorant or chop-like. I suppose it’s a bit like the Mail Goggles which stops you sending drunk emails.

So now if you decide to comment on a video clip eg – The New Loud Rockets from Rocking The Daisies, there will be a button saying “Audio Preview”.

Anyhoo, just thought I’d share that. Oh yes, the other thing is that you should probably think about subscribing to the offical Shaun Oakes YouTube Channel, which will be packed full of amazing footage and never-before-seen videos, giving you more insight into the exciting and dangerous life I lead. Content will be added regularly, and you will be a fool to miss out on it. Seriously, you will kick yourself and may need to go on anti-depressants. That’s how bad you will feel.

Okay, that’s all we have time for tonight. Until next time, take care of yourself, aaaaaand each other.

Doesn’t Look Too Bad.

After previously mentioning the group orgy held recently at the launch of the Apple iPhone, I thought it necessary to mention the fact that Google is about to unleash their own little bit of geek porn to the masses, namely the G1 phone which runs on something called the “Android” operating system. (The operating system is basically what developers will use to make useless applications for the phone, similar to the various iPhone applications floating around.)

Anyhoo, this phone at least looks somewhat decent in comparison to Apple’s number, as the pics below clearly illustrates:

G1 - Sexy.

Gphone - We Might Have Sex With It.

Maybe.

Again, as stated last time, not sure how much money I would be willing to fork out for this, probably not much. Having said that though, when one thinks of Google you tend to think of quality, and the downloading of free nudie pics (or is that just me?) so let’s sit back for a while and see how the whole cellphone war plays out.

Check out the G1 Phone’s official site here.