An Early Xmas Message To You

I was walking through the mall the other day, looking for hair removal cream for my disturbingly furry knuckles, when I heard what was probably the very first Christmas carol of the season.

We were in the first week of November, the sun was blazing, but I guess now is the time when store managers start sliding in their favourite Boney M treffers onto the shop DJ's playlist.

Christmas is just around the corner and, getting in the spirit of things, I decided to spoil you with my own little pre-Christmas E-card.

I was planning on getting in a couple of my famous model friends to strike a pose for me, but bizarrely all their phones were in for repairs this week and so I was unable to reach them. Some Other Guy was hanging around The HQ though, so I decided to use him instead.

Some Other Guy of course used this occasion to again show off his famous "dong thumb", which resembles the tip of a circumcised penis, and always raises a chuckle at dinner parties.



Almost Xmas - No Shitty Gifts This Year Please, Or Ill Never Speak To You Again.

This is ideal to send out to everyone you know, warning them that Christmas is approaching, and shitty and thoughtless gifts will be deemed unacceptable.

Simply right click on the image, select "Save As" and hey presto, store it on your desktop somewhere to easily send as an attachment.

Forward this to ALL your friends, family, people you don't really like, people you kind of like, and even a general nemesis or two.

What's the plural for "nemesis" anyway? I wanted to use the plural but I didn't know the word so I structured the sentence in a way that I wouldn't have to. Clever, hey?



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