Reviewing Movies On The Big Screen
Good Ones As Well As Shit Ones.
love nothing more than going to the cinema with The Girlfriend,
seating ourselves in a dark corner at the back, and then trying
to cop a feel.
Invariably this earns me a sharp jab in the throat, forcing me to
swallow blood for the next few hours and making me concentrate on
the movie at hand.
These are my reviews, from latest to oldest, which means the oldest ones would be at the bottom, and the latest ones would be at the top. Sorry for stating the obvious, but some of you seem quite slow, so I thought I would spell it out.
09 September, 2008
Ben Stiller's New Movie.
It was movie night, and The Girlfriend and I were in the mood for a comedy. The last time we had a good chuckle at the cinema was when we saw the trailer for "Hansie", just before the screening of The Dark Knight, and we were in the mood for similar belly laughs.
Thus, we decided to check out Tropic Thunder, the new flick starring Ben Stiller, Jack Black and Robert Downey Jnr. The basic plot revolves around a group of pampered Hollywood actors filming a war movie, who end up in the middle of a jungle in south-east Asia, and find themselves in a real-life war situation.
This isn't your standard Will Ferrel type comedy though. The humour doesn't jump up at you, it's more understated, and gently mocks various genres and industries. I think it's what is referred to as a "satire", NOT to be confused with a spoof - like those shitty "Epic Movies" that come out every few months. The dialogue is clever and witty, and you will need to have a bit of a brain to get some of the jokes. More
29 July, 2008
The Dark Knight
Besides the Hardy Boys mystery books and Scope magazine, Batman comics were always a popular reading choice as a young lad growing up in the psychedelic 80's. The dark, eerie and sometimes scary tone was never quite reflected on the big screen however. Sure, there were attempts in previous incarnations - besides Batman and Robin, which was incredibly mediocre and rather camp - but it was only in Batman Begins that the true essence of the Caped Crusader was really captured.
This continues with The Dark Knight, the sequel starring Christian Bale and the late Heath Ledger. This movie has been hyped up to the Moon, what with all the anticipation after the success of the previous film, together with the tragic death of Ledger. More
07 July, 2008
Don't Watch It. Seriously. Don't .
I once paid R200 for a warm Amstel.
It was a cold and dark Friday night at a nightclub called Blink in Claremont, I had just consumed 23 bottles of Smirnoff Ice (one after the other, it was sort of my "thing" at the time) and needed a change of beverage, otherwise I would have thrown up, which would probably have prevented me from making out with the flossie I was trying to impress. With the light at Blink being notoriously dim, and due to the fact that I DID just consume 23 bottles of Smirnoff, the R200 note understandably resembled a R20, and I generously told the ample-chested barlady to keep the change.
The annoyance experienced thereafter however, was NOTHING compared to the way I felt after watching Hancock, the new "movie" starring Will Smith. More
23 June, 2008
The Incredible Hulk
Is In Fact, Pretty Incredible.
So this weekend we decided to watch the new Incredible Hulk film. Many of you would have remembered the earlier Hulk film, made about 5 years back, starring Eric Bana and directed by Ang Lee. You would have remembered it because the film was so incredibly devoid of action, causing many viewers to die through sheer boredom, which I think pissed off many people.
Seriously, it was like The Ring - people were dropping like flies - so much so that the movie studios decided to make a new one as a "Sorry we f*cked up" gesture. This incarnation, starring the always reliable Edward Norton, goes a long way toward actually doing that. More
07 June, 2008
Is F*cking Awesome.
I was in two minds when I walked into the cinema to watch Iron Man. Firstly, because The Girlfriend threatened to inject pepper spray into my eyeballs if the movie sucked, as she wanted to watch Sex and The City instead. Secondly, I remember the cartoon series from the nineties being pretty shitty, with other superhero cartoons like Spiderman and X-Men kicking it squarely in the balls.
And thirdly, I noted that the movie was directed by Jon Favreau, best known for directing the kids' film Zathura, which I never watched, but understood to be pretty mediocre. More
13 February, 2008
The Bucket List
An Old Man's Chick Flick
It was movie night at the Favourite Son household,
and that meant only one thing - we were going to watch a movie.
Not just any movie though, we were in the mood for a special effects
blockbuster, with digital surround sound to temporarily deafen us.
Naturally then, we decided on The Bucket List,
starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman. More
23 January, 2008
I Am Legend
Will Smith Saves The World. Again.
I Am Legend is the latest Hollywood blockbuster
starring Will Smith, enabling Will Smith to save the world
Will Smith CLEARLY loves saving the world, as he has done it no
less than eight times now:
1) Independence Day - Will Smith saves the world from aliens.
2) Men In Black - Will Smith saves the world from... aliens again.
3) Men In Black II - AGAIN with the aliens. F**k.
4) Wild Wild West - Will Smith saves the world from a giant robot
5) Enemy Of The State - Will Smith saves the world from evil spies
6) I, Robot - Will Smith saves the world from homicidal robots.
7) Hitch - Will Smith saves the world from unromantic men.
8) I Am Legend - Saving the world again. More
29 February, 2008
The Jane Austen Book Club.
Shaun Is Punished And Made To Watch A Chick
It was 8:30 at the Favourite Son
household, it was coffee time, and I had put three sugars in The
Girlfriend's cuppa instead of her usual two. Normally, this would
result in her beating the bare soles of my feet with extra dry droe
wors, but on this occasion she was in a PARTICULARLY foul mood,
and decided to punish me accordingly.
So it came to pass then, that I found myself at the cinema watching
The Jane Austen Book Club, a bonafide chick flick
if ever there was one. More
06 January, 2007
The Golden Compass
Should Be Avoided. Don't Watch This Kak.
Ever since the massive success of "The Lord Of The Rings",
movie studios have been turning any old fantasy novel into a "fillum",
hoping to cash in.
Some have been pretty good, like "Narnia
(The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe)" whilst others have
turned out to be rather mediocre. More
15 October, 2007
Has Shaun Wishing He Had A Rat For A Friend
After a long hibernating Winter, it's movie season again, and so
The Girlfriend and I found ourselves at the cinema watching Ratatouille,
a film about rats and their fondness for cooking fine French cuisine.
This is ironic as I remember meeting a rat once many years ago during
my high school days, where I attempted to befriend
it as I was quite lonely and would often get picked on by the girls
because I would get my mom to cut the crusts off my sarmies, and
this was apparently frowned upon in modern society.
"Hello there, my rodent friend," I said to my rodent friend,
who was lounging near the Recycling Area, having a Rothman's Mild
13 June, 2007
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
Shaun Is Underwhelmed
I remember when Kanye West came down for a
concert in Cape Town last year. My friends literally shat themselves
in excitement when they heard the news on the radio, which left
me feeling slightly disgusted and resentful as
this all occurred in my car, leaving me to take it away for a valet
Nevertheless, I liked Kanye's music, and in the ensuing months,
also became increasingly excited, even going so far as to have his
name tattooed on my derriere
( which I've since managed to remove with a combination of Dettol
soap, a scour, and steely and determined resolve)
The concert arrived with much fanfare and I was left feeling.......
well...... underwhelmed. Basically I had put too much buildup to
the event and the concert, while good, still left me feeling a little
16 May, 2007
The King Of Scotland - Movie Review
Confusion Reigns As Shaun Expects Another
It was movie time again, and I was excitedly looking forward to
watching Spiderman 3, having put the poster up
in the bedroom at The HQ for months beforehand. The Girlfriend though,
was not up for it and lobbied for an alternative flick, so we settled
the argument in the age old tradition - with a fearsome game of
"Ching Chong Cha" (Paper Rock Scissors).
Sadly for me, The Girlfriend happens to be an incredibly gifted
player, having made the regional finals for 6 years running. More
17 April, 2007
Shaun Gets Very Excited
Attending a Catholic
primary school in the early 90's, I quickly learnt that
violence is the best way to solve any problem.
"Diplomacy is for Devil Worshippers and Communists", bellowed
old Sister Mary Clarence, an old bird incredibly intollerant toward
devil worshipers and communists, and so many debates would be settled
on the hallowed tarred playgrounds of one of Jesus's holy schools.
I was lead to recall these heady days as I watched 300
with The Girlfriend the other day. More
4 April, 2007
Painfully Long And Incredibly Boring
I normally make a point not to watch
Oscar winning films. I remember watching "Million
Dollar Baby" a couple of years back, the multi-award winning
film which was so boring I ended up drowning my goldfish Lawrence,
which wasn't a bad thing in the end because I later found out he
had been spreading horrible rumours about me behind my back.
So it was with slight trepidation that I ended up watching "Babel"
which had been critically acclaimed. It also starred Brad Pitt so
it couldn't be that bad, right? More
26 March, 2007
Why Irish Gangsters Are Not To Be Messed
I normally make a point not to watch Oscar winning films.
I remember watching "The English Patient" a few years
back, the multi-award winning film which was so boring I ended up
gnawing my arm off, which wasn't a bad thing in the end because
I had been born with three arms and had endured
many years of ridicule because of it.
So it was with slight trepidation that I ended up watching "The
Departed" which earned director Martin Scorsese his
golden gong. I had enjoyed "Goodfellas" and "Raging
Bull", but wasn't impressed with "Gangs of New York"
and didn't bother seeing "The Aviator" either. Why am
I mentioning those films, you ask? Because they were all directed
by Martin Scorsese, that's why. More
12 February, 2007
Little Miss Sunshine
Pleasantly Surprised By Independent Film
As everyone knows, Tuesday is Movie Night, and
the other night The Girlfriend and I went to catch Little
Miss Sunshine. This film has been receiving rave reviews
from critics everywhere and so understandably I was a little hesitant
to go and see it, as my movie tastes tend to go against popular
critical convention. (To this day I am still pissed that Van
Wilder never received the Oscar nomination I felt the movie
Although my favoured brand of comedy tends to fall under the lowbrow
toilet humour variety, I found this film incredibly funny. The jokes
are not thrown in your face, and a lot of it derives from the awkward
human interaction between an excellent cast. More
30 January, 2007
Magicians Taking Themselves Too Seriously
As everyone knows, Tuesday
is Movie Night, and the other night The Girlfriend
and I went to catch The Prestige. I had read a
lot of good press about this, I had enjoyed director Christopher
Nolan's previous film, Memento. I also like Batman
and Wolverine, and I've got a soft spot for Michael Caine, who is
like the eccentric old British neighbour everyone wishes they had.
The film is interesting in that it shows you another side of the
magician's world, behind the curtain. I always thought of magicians
as lovable old people who smelt of copper and cabbage. This film
shows that there is more to the Magnificent Marvin
and his friends than meets the eye. More
23 January, 2007
Leo DiCaprio Isn't Such A Wanker Anymore
As everyone knows, Tuesday
is Movie Night, and the other night me and The
Girlfriend (sorry, The Girlfriend and I) went to catch Blood
Diamond. Not usually a big Leonardo DiCaprio fan but I
had heard some good things from people I trust, and so went along
with an open mind. After watching it, let me say, believe the hype.
In fact, to steal a line from The 40-Year-Old-Virgin:"
I always thought that Leonardo DiCaprio was like a Streisand, but
he's rocking the shit in this one!"
He plays a total badass by the name of Danny Archer,
or "Denny Orcher" as he calls himself, in his near flawless
South African accent. The movie can best be described as an action
flick with a conscience. More
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